This section is for you if you are doing the FL401 form to apply to the family court for a non-molestation order and an occupation order. On the left, is information to help you write your statement for the family court. It tells you all the things you should try to put in your statement and how to begin. On the right is Sarah-Jane’s statement that she has written to support her FL401 form to apply for a non-molestation order and an occupation order. We have included it to show you what sort of details about your situation you should include in your statement. |
Front page of your statement Statements for the court need to be set out in a particular way with information in the top right hand corner and then the details of the case set out like we have done here. The case number is the unique number given to your case when you take your application to the court. They will add it and then it will be on all future court documents. The words in your statement need to be double spaced (for less confident computer users, you do this on MS Word by selecting the Home tab and selecting the line spacing option 2.0) and must only be printed on one side of the paper. Where it says ‘Sitting at’ you need to add the name of your local court | Statement of the Applicant: S-J Coombs Statement no: 1 Exhibits: 1 Dated: 28/2/24 Case number: IN THE FAMILY COURT SITTING AT ............................................ IN THE MATTER OF THE FAMILY LAW ACT 1996 BETWEEN: Sarah-Jane Coombs Applicant and Michael James Thompson Respondent FIRST STATEMENT OF THE APPLICANT |
Introduction Explain who you are and who the person you want the order against, is. Say how you are related, for example by saying you are applying for an order against your husband or ex-partner. After the first paragraph you need to number all the paragraphs. Give brief details of any children - full names, dates of birth, who their parents are and where they live / who they live with. You cannot keep an address confidential if you are applying for an occupation order. This is because an order cannot be made to prevent someone from being somewhere or going somewhere if they don’t know where it is. | I, Sarah- Jane Coombs, of 2 Regent Road, London, make this statement in support of my application for a non-molestation order and an occupation order against my ex-partner, the respondent, Michael James Thompson. - I live at the above address. This property is rented in our joint names from a private landlord. The respondent was living with me for nearly three years. He is currently staying at his mother’s house.
- I have two children who both live with me. My eldest child, Lily Rose Coombs (D.o.B: 5.6.15) is 8 years old. Her father is Alastair Peters. I separated from Lily Rose’s father when she was 4 years old. Unfortunately I do not know his whereabouts. My youngest child, Jasmine Claire Thompson (17.1.23) is just one year old. The respondent is Jasmine’s father.
|
History of your relationship Explain how you met and how long you have been a couple. Give dates here if you possibly can. Even rough dates help to paint a picture for the court. Explain when you first noticed his/her behaviour change and become more controlling or explain how it was controlling from the start. Give plenty of examples. This might feel really embarrassing but the more details you give on paper the clearer the situation will be for the Judge which will help him or her to make a decision more easily. | - The respondent and I met through friends just over three years ago over Christmas 2021. We started dating almost immediately. At first the respondent was charming, fun and attentive. In May 2022, after about 5 months of seeing each other he needed somewhere to stay for a bit. I was renting my own small flat so I agreed he could come and stay with my daughter Lily Rose and I, while he worked things out.
- Soon after he moved in I found out I was pregnant. He was delighted by the news and talked about us all being a proper family together with the baby. I was worried that things were moving too fast but he reassured me that everything would be fine. He was keen to have his name added to the tenancy. He persuaded me to arrange for my landlord to create a new joint tenancy in both our names. I agreed as he said it would make it our family home and of course that was what I wanted for my daughter and the baby.
- About a month or two after I found out I was pregnant things started to go downhill. He didn’t want to do anything anymore, saying it would be better for the baby if I rested at home. When I wanted to go out anywhere it would lead to an argument about how I wasn’t putting him and the baby first so gradually I stopped going out. When I was out without him, for example at work, or doing a food shop, he would call me all the time to see what I was doing and ask me who I was with.
- I noticed he started to tell me what clothes I should wear. If I wore the ones he didn’t like he shouted at me. He would say I wanted other men’s attention and would question my commitment to our future together with the baby. Whenever I bought anything for Lily Rose or spent any money on her like a little treat he would criticise me and tell me I needed to save my money for our child.
- He seemed to suffer from mood swings. When he was in a bad mood he would be really critical of me. If I suggested that he cook for a change or do things around the flat he would say I was getting lazy and relying on him too much. During arguments he would call me a lazy bitch and a tart and tell me I had no one but him now. Occasionally, during arguments, if he was near me he would shove me or squeeze my face as he went past. As the months past and my bump grew he would tell me I was getting fat and that I needed to make more effort with my appearance. I felt as though I could do nothing right.
- I became emotional and tired easily and Lily Rose picked up on this. She would cry when she saw I was upset and tell me how she didn’t like it when the respondent shouted at me. She took to hiding under the table when he got angry.
- I felt more and more isolated as friends stopped getting in touch and I have no family in London. After arguments he would always be so apologetic I would forgive him. He would be sweet and attentive again for a while. However, he would still control my every move by constantly demanding to see my phone so I could prove I wasn’t seeing someone else. Things got a bit better when Jasmine was born in January 2023. He was so happy to be a dad and I hoped things would settle between us and we would be happy as a family of four.
- Through 2023 there were times when the respondent would get very angry and push me around. This would usually happen when the children were asleep. He would start an argument about how all I was interested in was the baby and Lily Rose. I would try and calm him down and then get away from him by going to the bedroom. This would make him worse and he would hit the door or kick a chair and push me back to sit on the sofa and listen to him. I was desperate to protect the girls from his behaviour and so I would beg him to stop and do whatever he asked. Then he would calm down and it would be ok again for a few weeks or even a few months.
|
Incidents of abuse / violence / serious threats of violence Give details of first or early occasions when you remember he/she was actually violent or threatened violence towards you. Again, the more details you can give the better as it will help the court understand what has been happening. You are highly unlikely to be able to remember each and every incident of controlling, abusive or violent behaviour. It is fine to say this. If you can remember any dates or even just the month or year that will help the court a lot. Do try and include the early ones to explain how things developed. Then include the worst incidents and then at the end add in the most recent to bring it right up to date for the court. You can put in headings to show the different incidents to help the judge. | - I cannot remember the exact date when the respondent was first violent towards me. I remember it was last summer and I had cooked a nice dinner. I somehow upset the respondent and he was already in a bad mood about work. He suddenly grabbed his plate that was full of food and threw it at the wall. I was shocked and very scared. Both the children were at the table and were terrified. He was shouting abuse at me. And I told him he had to stop as he was scaring us all. He kept shouting and backed me into the tiny kitchen against the cupboard. I remember he screamed in my face ‘or what?’ and then grabbed me around the neck tightly. I was trying to scream and gasping for breath. He loosened his grip and I pushed him away but then he grabbed my upper arm really hard and held me back. I was screaming and crying begging him to let me go. The children witnessed the whole thing.
- After this occasion the respondent was very apologetic and went to stay with his mum for about 10 days. I remember that after seeing what the respondent did, the children were extremely clingy and Lily Rose refused to let me out of her sight. For days after, she would cry and scream when I left her at school.
- In the end the respondent and I started messaging about the children and then he came back after promising he would get some help about his anger and spend more time with the children and his friends, instead always being in the flat. Things got better for about two or three months. He would still shout at me and lash out, by kicking the door for example, but not as often.
|
Incidents of abuse / violence / serious threats of violence - most serious incident It might be that there have been lots of similar, very serious, incidents. It is best to give lots of details on what you remember as the most, or some of the most, serious incidents. This will make it clear to the court how dangerous the other person is and what he or she has the potential to do when made angry. This shows why you are applying to the court for protection. | - On Boxing Day he had argued with his dad and drunk too much. We went home and after the children went to bed he lost control. He punched the wall, leaving marks and kicked the telly. He smashed a candle holder and a picture frame. The noise woke the children and I could hear them crying in their room. I told him I would call the police or that a neighbour would. He just laughed in my face and then he grabbed me by the hair and dragged me across the room and chucked me onto the sofa. I was terrified of what he would do next. I was crying and screaming and trying to cover my face with my arms. Then he punched me several times about my body then stormed out. As he went he grabbed my phone from the sideboard and threw it against the tiled floor causing it to smash and break.
- After he left I went straight to see the children who were curled up in Jasmine’s bed together. They were crying and shaking. I took them to my neighbour’s and called the police from my neighbour’s phone. The police came to the flat a few hours later. They took details and arrested him and released him on bail. In the end I couldn’t face the thought of Jasmine’s father going to prison so I refused to help with the rest of the investigation and they dropped the case.
|
Most recent incident/s of abuse / violence or serious threats of violence. The most recent incident or a few of the most recent incidents are the usually the most important as it is these which the court will rely on for making an order to protect you. Include as much detail as you can, such as: - when it happened,
- where it happened,
- what happened,
- who did what,
- if anyone else saw anything,
- if anyone helped you.
It is good to include any incidents where other people saw or heard how the other person was behaving towards you, even if what they saw wasn’t as serious as things that have happened between you behind closed doors. This is because other people are independent (outside the relationship) and can support what you are saying. They may also be called as witnesses. If there are any witnesses ask if they will help you by doing a witness statement and by coming to court if the judge asks them to answer questions about what they saw or heard. | - The respondent stayed away for a while after this. I told him the relationship was over. He would not accept this and I found it hard to stand up to him. He would come over with gifts for the children and flowers and a take away and we would talk and it would be like it was at the start. Gradually over the weeks I started to think perhaps he had changed. He told me he had seen his GP to get some help and wanted us to work. Jasmine particularly missed him and would ask for him regularly. About three weeks ago he moved back in on a trial basis. He didn’t like staying at his mum’s. I understood this and agreed to give it another go. He seemed more relaxed and I felt happier - not walking on egg shells anymore.
- 4 days ago I had a colleague’s leaving drinks to go to after work. The respondent’s mum had agreed to pick up the girls from school and nursery for me and have them over night. While I was out I saw I had 11 missed calls from the respondent. I was surprised as I had told him what I was doing in the morning and so I called him back. As I was on the phone I saw him come round the corner of the beer garden. He looked almost possessed. I said to my friend that he was coming and that I was scared of what he would do. He came up to me and started shouting at me. Then he grabbed my wrist and pulled me away telling me we had to go and that he had been so worried about me. He forced me into a cab he had waiting outside the pub garden and we went home.
- We argued some more in the flat as I was so angry at how he had embarrassed me in front of my work friends and even my boss. He seemed to get angrier and angrier and as I tried to go to the bedroom to get away from him he followed me along the little hallway and pushed me against the front door. He grabbed me by my hair to twist me around to face him and then hit me across the face. I tried to push him off me. He then grabbed me by the neck and held me up against door. I couldn’t breathe. He finally let go and I fell on the floor.
- Later that night he left and said he was going to his mum’s for a bit but that he would be back home soon. As he went he said I needed to remember it wasn’t over, that he would never leave us, and that he would always know where I was and what I was doing.
|
What prompted you to apply to the court It is important that you tell the court what action you have taken since the most recent incident. This explains what / who has encouraged you to apply. If you have reported the matter to the police make sure you say this in your statement. Add in crime reference numbers or log numbers if you have them. If other people have helped you, include information about that. For example: - The police might have referred you to local specialist charities or organisations for support.
- It might have been the police who told you make your application
- or a friend who has some experience of the situation you are in has suggested it.
- It could be that you have had advice from a family law solicitor, but are now doing this without her or his help.
If the other person is harassing you by phone or text the court will probably ask you what you have done to change your number. If the other person is harassing you online the court will ask if you have blocked him or her or even closed that account. | - The next day I went to work and my friend persuaded me to contact the police, which I did. Later that day when I was due to leave I found him waiting just outside for me. He said he would meet me at work every day from now on as it would be good to be together more. He has met me after work and walked me home each day since the incident. I have changed my mobile number so he can’t call me or text me. When he realised this he just laughed in my face and told me he knows where I am all the time so what was the point.
- The police have opened a file but they have told me to apply to the family court for a non - molestation order.
|
Details of the order you are asking the court to make - non-molestation order. If you think it would help, you can print off a map of any locations you want the court to stop the other person from going to. You can find the address on google maps and then print it off and mark your exact address on the map and attach it to your statement. You can also give the court other evidence if you have it such as photos of injuries, medical records or print outs of abusive or threatening messages or emails -for example text messages or WhatsApp messages. These can be very helpful as they are easy to get hold of and really show the court what the other person is like. Don’t worry if you don’t have any other evidence though - often there is no evidence other than what you and the other person says about what happened. If you are asking for a without notice order say this here and give the reason or reasons why. The different reasons are listed here: The court can hear your application and make an order without the other person knowing, if it thinks you will be at risk of significant harm if the order is not made straight away. (Be aware that your application and statement still get seen by the other person when they get given the court order). If you would be put off from applying for an order if it is not made straight away, then you can give this as a reason. You might well be put off from applying if the other person is told about the hearing before because you won’t be protected until the order is made and given to the other person. Another reason you can give is that you think the other person knows you are planning to apply for an order and will try to make sure they are not given the court paperwork. This is called evading service and this would cause delay in you getting the protection you need. Be aware that you are only protected by the order once it has been given to the other person. The court decides whether or not the order should be made without the other person being told about it first. This means that if the court decides the other person should be told in advance you will both need to go to the hearing where the court will then decide what order to make. | - I respectfully request that the court make the following order:
The respondent is forbidden to - use or threaten violence against me and must not instruct, encourage or in any other way suggest that any other person should do so,
- communicate with me in any way save via his mother about child arrangements,
- pester me at my place of work, by going to Dalby Lane, London.
I confirm that the respondent has no reason to go to Dalby Lane, which is a no through road.
I respectfully request that the court grant me the above order without notice being first given to the respondent. I am terrified of what the respondent may do next. If he found out I had applied to court for an order against him and we both had to wait for a hearing date, I am certain he would be violent to me again given his recent violent behaviour. I would be too afraid of him to apply on notice. |
Details of the order you are asking the court to make - occupation order. Here you need to give details to the court about: - the housing needs and resources of you, the other person and any children
- the financial needs of you and the other person
- the likely impact of any order, or any decision not to make an order, on you, the other person and any children
- your and the other person’s behaviour to each other and any children.
You will have already given details about the other person’s behaviour so you just need to focus on the other points in the list. If you have a copy of the tenancy agreement or evidence about how you own the home (such as a copy of the land registry record for the home or a mortgage statement addressed to you both) it is useful to attach this to your statement for the judge to see. That way the judge will be clear about who has what legal rights in relation to the home. Here (at parapraph 6) is the standard wording for the occupation order, for you to adapt. Don’t forget to include the final sentence if you want the other person to be arrested by the police if he or she does not follow the order. Without this the police cannot arrest the other person and you would have to go back to the family court to enforce the order. This wording is standard wording used to tell the court about any extra documents you want to show it to back up your case. It can be helpful to include this last paragraph to tell the court that if the other person fights the making of the orders you are asking for you will ask for permission to give the court more information about the other person’s behaviour. This could include for example a witness doing a statement. | - I also request that the court grant me an occupation order. The respondent is a joint tenant at the family home. I exhibit at ‘SJC1’ a copy of the tenancy agreement.
- The police tell me he is allowed to come and go as he pleases. He has said he will come back home soon. He has his own key and can let himself in and be violent to me whenever he wants. I am terrified that he will come back to live with us at any time.
- If an occupation order is not made to stop the respondent from coming to the home, I fear that I will be in serious danger and the children will witness more abuse.
- If the occupation order is made the respondent will have to continue to live at his mother’s home, where he is already. He works full time in a well-paid role so he will be able to afford to rent somewhere by himself if he wants to.
- The respondent can live with his mum as she has a three bedroom house. We, on the other hand have nowhere else to go. Our flat has been Lily Rose’s home for 7 years. I don’t want her to face any more upheaval or stress by having to move. I am the main carer of both the children and I need two bedrooms for us all, unlike the respondent. Also, as I have been a tenant here for a long time I have a low rent because the landlord says I am a reliable tenant. I work part time and would not be able to afford current rents somewhere else near Lily Rose’s school and Jasmine’s nursery.
- I respectfully request that the court make the following order:
- The respondent shall not occupy 2 Regent Road, London,
- Having left 2 Regent Road, London he shall not enter or attempt to enter the property, or,
- Go within 50 metres of it.
- A power of arrest is attached to all paragraphs of the occupation order.
I attach at exhibit ‘SJC2’ a map of the above location and a map of the location of my work to assist the court in making its decision. Due to the urgent nature of this application if the respondent opposes the application I will request permission to file further evidence in relation to the respondent’s abusive behaviour. |
You must include this wording - without it, the court can decide not to allow the statement to be used as evidence which means it can be ignored by the court when it makes its decision. | I understand that proceedings for contempt of court may be brought against anyone who makes, or causes to be made, a false statement in a document verified by a statement of truth without an honest belief in its truth. I believe that the facts stated in this form and any continuation sheets are true. |
You must sign and date your statement. | Signed………………………. Dated……………………….. |
Exhibit front sheet If you want to give the court any extra documents to support your statement, you will need a ‘front sheet’ set out like this example. Print this and then put whatever document you want behind it and put it at the end of your statement. If you have several documents it is helpful to do several front sheets. So, for example, you could do a front sheet for any maps and then another one for a different type of document such as any photos of injuries. Just a few examples of extra documents you may want to give to the court are medical records, copies of abusive texts, WhatsApp messages or emails from the other person or letters in support from a social worker. Make sure you number all the pages of your statement and any exhibits when you finish. | Statement of the Applicant: S-J Coombs Statement no: 1 Exhibits: 1 Dated: 28/2/24 Case number: IN THE FAMILY COURT SITTING AT................. IN THE MATTER OF THE FAMILY LAW ACT 1996 BETWEEN: Sarah-Jane Coombs Applicant and Michael James Thompson Respondent |
Really helpful advice, thank you so much!