Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM)

You must attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM) before you can apply to the court for a parental responsibility order – unless you fall into the limited circumstances that mean you don’t have to do this. (For more information about these circumstances, see Circumstances when you don’t have to attend a MIAM below.)

The purpose of this meeting is to:

• explore whether you really have to go to court or whether you might be able to come to an agreement, and
• assess whether mediation is a safe way for you and the other parent to try and sort out your disagreement.
   

Mediation aims to help you communicate with one another now and in the future and to reduce any conflict between you. Trained mediators can help you talk to each other and find solutions, even when it is hard. They are there to help you both and can provide you with a safe and supportive environment where you can work out solutions together. The MIAM is to help you understand how mediation can help. You have to attend the MIAM meeting but you cannot be made to take part in mediation itself - it is voluntary.

What happens at a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting?
 

The meeting will probably last about 40-45 minutes. The mediator:

• explains what family mediation and other forms of dispute resolution are and how they work,
• explains the benefits of mediation, other forms of dispute resolution, and the likely costs,
• answers any questions you have about your situation and how mediation might work for you,
• assesses whether you are eligible for legal aid for mediation or will have to pay for it,
• assesses whether mediation or other form of dispute resolution is suitable in your case, and
• completes part of form FM1 if you want to make a court application. (Form FM1 is one of the forms you must complete as part of your application for a parental responsibility order.)
   

Once you have been to the Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting, you or the family mediator may decide there are reasons why mediation will not work. This may be because there has been domestic abuse in your relationship. It may be that either or both of you have a drug or alcohol problem or mental health problems. That problem or illness may mean that it isn’t safe for mediation to take place.

Circumstances when you don’t have to attend a MIAM

There are some circumstances when you don’t have to attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting.

You ask the court to agree that you don’t have to go to a MIAM. This is called ‘claiming an exemption’. You can claim an exemption if

• if your application is urgent,
• there are allegations against or by you of domestic violence, 
• there are child protection concerns. 

There are other exceptions too. You can find the full list of circumstances in which you can ask the court to agree that you don’t have to attend a MIAM in the FM1 form that you need to fill in to apply for a parental responsibility order.

How to arrange a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting

You need to contact an authorised family mediator to set up a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting. They will invite you to attend a MIAM either separately or together. You can find an authorised family mediator by searching here: Family mediator search

How much does it cost to go to a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting?

Charges vary from service to service. When you phone a family mediator to arrange a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting, ask about how much they charge and about legal aid. Some make no charge for the Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting itself but charge for completing the relevant section of the FM1 form.

Legal aid (help paying for legal advice) is available to pay for family mediation, depending on your financial circumstances. The mediation service can tell you whether or not you can get legal aid.

If either you or your ex is entitled to legal aid then the initial Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting, completing the relevant part of form FM1 and the first mediation session are free for both of you. After that, any further mediation sessions will only be free for the person who has legal aid. If you are the person who isn’t eligible for legal aid, you will have to pay for any mediation sessions after the first one. You must take documents proving what your income is and what savings you have to the first meeting. The mediation service will explain what evidence they need to see in more detail, but if you are not clear what to take with you, don’t hesitate to ring them and ask. Without this evidence you risk getting charged because the service won’t be able to assess your eligibility for legal aid.

You start your application for a parental responsibility order by following the steps in this check list:

There are certain people who have to be given a copy of your application. Anyone in this position is called a ‘respondent’. In an application for a parental responsibility order, the respondents are everyone you believe has parental responsibility. This may just be the child’s birth mother but in other circumstances could include a child’s father, a second female parent or a step-parent.

If the child is subject to a care order this means there is a court order in place which puts the child in the care of the local authority. In this situation, the respondents are everyone with parental responsibility and everyone you believe had parental responsibility immediately before the court made the care order.

There are also other people – people who don’t have parental responsibility - who you have to tell about your application for a parental responsibility order. So, for example, if the child is in the care of a local authority you have to tell them, if the child lives in a children’s home or a refuge then you have to tell the organisation that runs it. You also have to tell everyone who cares for the child, for example, grandparents or other family members. You tell these people or organisations about your application by sending them a Form C6A which you will get from the court. You do not have to send them a copy of your application.

If you are not sure who should be a respondent, or who else you should tell about your application, phone the court office and ask.

Who sends the application to the respondent(s)?

You must send each respondent a copy of your application form and the other documents the court sends to you. The court will send you instructions on how to do this.

The process of sending your application to the people who must see it or notifying those who must know about it is called ‘service’.

You will need to send each respondent:

• A copy of your application
• C6 Form - Notice of hearing - this is the letter that tells everyone when the first hearing will be and where.
• C7 Form - Acknowledgement of service form - this is the form that the respondent(s) has to fill in and send to the court to say they know about your application.
• C6A Form - you may need to send this to certain people too, if for example, the local authority is looking after the child, the child is living with other relatives or in a refuge.
   

When you have sent all the paperwork to the respondent(s) and any other people who need to know about your application you need to tell the court you have done this.

You do this by using the C9 Form, which is also called a ‘certificate of service’ form, which the court will send to you with the other paperwork. In this form you need to list who you sent it to, the date you sent it and how you sent it, for example by first class post.

If you have been sent an application for a parental responsibility order, the court calls you a ‘respondent’.

You need to read this section to find out what to do next. If you are the one applying for the order you can skip this section and go on to the next one.

Step one 
Read through what you have been sent carefully. You should have at least 3 different forms:

• notice of proceedings (Form C6) – this tells you the date, time and place of the first court hearing.
• form C1 – this gives you information about the application. 
• acknowledgement (Form C7) – this is the form you use to tell the court that you have received the application. The legal term for this is ‘acknowledgement of service’.
   

Step 2 
Fill in Form C7. There are instructions on Form C7 telling you what you need to do. It asks

• for details about you (and your solicitor, if you have one),
• whether you disagree with the application,
• whether you want to apply for a court order yourself, and,
• if you think the child who the application is about has suffered or could be at risk of suffering violence or harm.

If the applicant says that the children have suffered or are at risk of suffering domestic abuse, violence or harm you will also get another form, form C1A. This form is called ‘Allegations of harm and domestic violence’. There is a section at the back of this form for you to complete if you want to comment on the allegations. You may want to get legal advice about what to say on one or both of these forms (see More help and advice).

If the applicant has not filled in form C1A but you think the child(ren) have suffered or are at risk of suffering domestic abuse, violence or harm you should fill one in yourself and send it back to the court.

Step 3
Once you have filled in form C7 (and C1A if necessary) take or send it to the court office. You should find the address of the court office on the forms you have been sent. You must do this within 14 days of the date when you were given the Notice of proceedings or of the postmark on the envelope if the Notice of proceedings was posted to you.

Forms and rules

You can find form C7 here:
Acknowledgement (Form C7)

You can find form C1A here: 
Form C1A

You might find some court guidance useful.

CB1 - This is court guidance on what to expect if you apply to the family court and which orders you can apply for.

CB7- This is court guidance for separated parents involved in the family court

In this section, we explain what happens at the first court hearing. Some of the steps below may not be necessary if:

• you can reach agreement on some issues, or,
• you are applying for parental responsibility alongside another application, such as for contact, and the steps have already been taken.

Before the first hearing
In some cases you may be told to do something before you go to court for the first hearing; if so you will receive an order from the court. (An ‘order’ is a decision of the court.) For example, you may have to attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting if you have not been to one, and the court decides that you have wrongly claimed to be exempt.

Before the Covid 19 pandemic, these types of hearings all took place in a court building. During the pandemic all hearings went online, using video calls or phone calls. It is likely that some hearings will continue to be what is often called ‘remote’ where the hearing is by video or phone. Many hearings are back in court buildings now, but if you are told by the court that yours will be by video or phone call be sure to look at our short guide called Court and tribunal hearings by video or phone call.

If you are unable to reach agreement at the first hearing, it may be that the court will postpone (adjourn) the case to get a Cafcass report or to investigate allegations of domestic abuse. When this further information is available, the court may ask you to attend a Dispute Resolution Appointment. At this hearing the court will explore with you whether you and the respondent(s) can agree about parental responsibility, even at this late stage.

If you are unable to reach agreement, the court will order that the case is listed for a final hearing.

The court can do a number of things at a Dispute Resolution Appointment, for example:

• identify the key issue(s) that need to be decided and how far they can be sorted out at this hearing;
• consider whether your case can be dealt with and finished at this hearing;
• listen to the evidence as a way of resolving or narrowing down the areas of disagreement (the law calls these ‘issues’) between you;
• identify what evidence there is on the areas of disagreement which remain to be sorted out at the final hearing;
• give final case management directions. These can include instructions about what further evidence you must prepare, whether you must make a statement, and the date of the final hearing.

In this section we explain what a final hearing is, what happens in it and how to get ready for it.

The final hearing is when the court hears the evidence and makes a decision. But this only happens if you cannot reach an agreement yourselves. People often think that the judge or magistrates will run the hearing, ask the questions and unpick the evidence to get at the truth. They will help where they can (particularly if they think that you are struggling) but if it is your application, generally you have to be prepared to take the lead.
Courts vary in how they start a final hearing. The judge or magistrates may invite you to speak, or not. They may just expect you to start. If you are not sure what to do, just stand up and say something like, ‘Would you like me to start now?’ If you don’t know their name, it is best to call a man ‘Sir’ and a woman ‘Madam’.

In the room where the hearing takes place you sit in the front row. You usually stand up when you want to speak and sit down when someone else speaks. Sometimes hearings take place in rooms rather than in courts and you may not need to stand up when speaking. If in doubt about where you should sit, and whether to stand or sit when speaking, just ask the court.

You and the respondent will each have a chance to tell your story (the law calls this ‘giving evidence’). You will have to make a formal promise to the court to tell the truth (the law calls this ‘take an oath’ or ‘affirm’). Whoever is the applicant goes first and the respondent second. If the respondent is represented by a lawyer, then the lawyer will get them to tell their story by asking them questions. When they finish telling their story, you will usually get the chance to ask them questions. If the court thinks that your ex is a victim of abuse you might not be allowed to ask questions yourself. The court may ask you to write down your questions or find some other way of putting them to your ex. In any event the court will probably help by asking questions where necessary. When you ask questions, make sure they are questions and not speeches.

When you finish telling your story, the judge or magistrates (or the respondent’s lawyer if they have one) can ask you questions. When someone asks you a question listen to it carefully and answer the question you are being asked. If you don’t understand the question, say so and ask for it to be put in a different way.

If Cafcass or CAFCASS Cymru has prepared a report, the author of the report usually attends court for the final hearing. This will give you, the respondent and the court an opportunity to ask them questions about what the report says and the recommendations.

The court decides whether to make a parental responsibility order and explains the reasons for the decision. Sometimes this will not happen on the same day as the full hearing because the court needs more time to think about your case. In this situation you will be asked to come back to court another day. You won’t have to wait too long, maybe another few weeks.

If your hearing has to take place remotely, via video or phone call it will obviously be quite different as you won’t all be present in the same space together. This can mean the hearing takes a bit longer. The order in which things happen will be the same as if you are all in a court building. If you have this kind of hearing it is really important to prepare just as much as you would if it was in a court building. If you know your hearing is going to take place via video or phone call take a look at our short guide called Court and tribunal hearings by video or phone call.This is full of tips on how to prepare.

What does the court take into account when making a decision?

The law explains what the court needs to take into account when making a decision about whether to grant a parental responsibility order. The court will consider the child’s welfare above all else. You may hear lawyers call this the ‘paramount consideration’ test. This is about trying to decide, sometimes in difficult circumstances, what is in the child’s best interests.

The law says that the court must assume that a child’s welfare will improved by having a parent involved in their life, unless there is evidence to suggest that parent might cause the child harm.

In practice the court will think about things like:

the degree of commitment you have shown towards the child,
how close you and the child are, and
your reasons for applying for a parental responsibility order. For example, the court might be worried if it thinks you will use your parental responsibility to try to micromanage the time the child is with the other parent, because this might upset the child’s care rather than be good for the child.
If you are the child’s biological dad and can show commitment, a close relationship and proper reasons for applying, the court will usually grant you parental responsibility. If you are the child’s mum, you need to consider carefully whether to object to parental responsibility if the dad can show those three things.

If you don’t turn up to the hearing, perhaps because you are feeling sick with nerves, it will usually still go ahead. To avoid this, try and get a friend to go with you. If you don’t go, it is likely that you will lose your case. If you have a good reason for not being able to get to court, it is really important that you phone the court office and ask them to get a message to the judge or magistrates explaining the reason. They will then know that you are not simply avoiding the hearing. If you are genuinely too ill to attend court, you will usually have to provide a letter from your doctor to confirm this.

Have a look at our step by step description of how Rob applies for a parental responsibility order. It is designed to give you an overall picture of what is involved in a typical application for a parental responsibility order. Even though your case may be different, we hope it makes the process seem a bit less daunting.

You will come across lots of new technical words. This is the jargon that lawyers and court staff use. We think there’s no getting around it - you have to understand what it means too. You can find them explained in What does it mean?

The story so far.......Rob and Beth have 2 children; one is 7 years old and the other is 5. Rob and Beth no longer live together and never married. Rob’s name is not on the children’s birth certificates. The children live with Beth and see their Dad regularly. Rob asked Beth to make a parental responsibility agreement but she refused.

This is a step by step description of how Rob applies for a parental responsibility order.

Start

1. Rob finds a family mediator, asks about their charges and arranges a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting with them.
2. The mediator invites both Beth and Rob to attend this meeting but Beth refuses to go. At the end of the meeting the mediator fills in the FM1 form and gives it to Rob.
3. Rob fills in the C1 form as fully as possible and signs and dates it.
4. Rob makes 3 copies of the completed C1 and FM1 forms. He needs the original application and FM1 for the court and copies of the application for Beth, Cafcass, and his own records.
5. Rob checks whether the family court charges a fee for this kind of application. He applies for help with fees. You can apply for help online or fill out a paper form - called EX160.
6. Rob sends these documents to the family court: the completed C1 form and 3 copies, the completed FM1 form and 3 copies, and the completed form EX160 - help with fees form.
7. The court issues the application and returns the copies of the application to Rob together with a Notice of proceedings form (Form C6 or C6A), an Acknowledgement form (Form C7) and a Statement of Service form (C9).
8. Rob sends a copy of the C1 form together with a Notice of proceedings form, and Acknowledgement form by 1st class post to Beth.
9. Rob fills in the Statement of Service form (C9), makes a copy for himself and sends the original to the court.
10. Rob and Beth go to the family court for the First Hearing Dispute Resolution Appointment (FHDRA).
11. Rob and Beth can’t agree that Rob should have parental responsibility and so the court makes directions instead. The court tells both Rob andBeth to write a statement setting out their views and gives them a deadline for doing this. The court also asks the Cafcass officer to prepare a report and make a recommendation. The court fixes a date for the next hearing which will be a Dispute Resolution Appointment. (A statement is a written summary of the background to the disagreement, any recent events that have caused the court application and your view about what should happen in the future. You can find a template to help you write one at Witness statement template (Child arrangements - Parental dispute.)
12. Rob and Beth write their statements and send them to the court and a copy to each other in good time before the deadline.
13. The Cafcass officer visits Rob and Beth separately, meets the children and writes a report recommending that Rob has parental responsibility.
14. At the Dispute Resolution Appointment the court explains to Beth that the Cafcass report recommends that Rob should have parental responsibility. The court encourages Beth to agree the report’s recommendation. Beth agrees.
15. The court makes a parental responsibility order in Rob’s favour.
16. The court gives Beth and Rob a copy of the order before they leave court.

Finish

How to find a family mediator

If you are looking for a family mediator you could ask friends and family for a recommendation or your solicitor, if you have one. It is a good idea to check any recommendations using the family mediator finder service on the Family Mediation Council website.

It is fine to phone around, ask how much they charge and compare prices.

For more useful information on mediation as a process have a look at A survival guide to family mediation.

How to find legal advice

Ask friends and family for a recommendation. You can also look at the links here.

Resolution is a membership organisation for family lawyers and other professionals committed to the constructive resolution of family disputes. You can find good family law solicitors and mediators near you on their website. A green tick next to the lawyer’s name tells you that they offer legal aid.

You can also search for a specialist lawyer near you who has been accredited by the Law Society. This means they have a significant amount of experience and expertise and have passed a Law Society assessment - go to Find a solicitor in England and Wales

You can also find a family lawyer who offers legal aid via Find a legal adviser or family mediator

Another way to get legal advice is to speak to a barrister who is qualified to represent members of the public directly (without a solicitor being involved). There are limits on what a barrister can do outside of representation at court but it is often a cheaper option if you just want to get some advice rather than have a solicitor to negotiate on your behalf. The details of appropriately qualified barristers and an explanation of the way the system works can be found by going to Direct Access Portal. Don’t be afraid to phone around to compare prices or see if you can find someone who will give you the first appointment for free.

The Royal Courts of Justice Advice Bureau may be able to help you if you:

• live in England or Wales,
• have a case in the Family Court, High Court or Court of Appeal, and
• are not already represented by a solicitor or barrister.

To book an appointment please check their website: Royal Courts of Justice Advice Bureau for latest appointment details.

Coram Children’s Legal Centre offers a Child Law Advice Service where you can get free and confidential advice on specific questions you may have on family law and education law if you do not have legal representation.

The demand for the advice line is high, so they are only able to answer a limited number of calls. Therefore, make sure you read through the information on their website and only contact the support line with specific questions on the information provided. You can only get advice if you are a resident of England.

To contact them about a family law matter, call 0300 330 5480. Lines are available Monday-Friday between 8.30am-5pm. Calls will cost no more than calls to geographic (01 and 02) numbers and will be included in any inclusive minutes offered by your phone service provider.

They also offer a call-back service between 8.30am-5.30pm Monday-Friday. There is a charge of £25 for a 30 minute advice call and then an additional charge of an extra £10 for each additional 15 minutes.

Help at court or at video or phone hearing

The charity Support Through Court supports people going through the court process without a lawyer. Volunteers offer a free and confidential service at some court buildings. You can look at their website to see if they have an office at your local court. The volunteers aim to help you manage your own case yourself. They cannot give legal advice or act on your behalf, but can offer practical help such as going to your hearing with you and supporting you with your forms.

They can also help you if your hearing is by video or phone, by talking you through the process and sometimes joining the hearing too. They run a free national helpline 03000 810 006, open Monday to Friday 10.30am - 3.30pm. This is a good place to start for information on what they can do to help you.

Child contact centres

Child contact centres are neutral places where children of separated families can spend time with the parent they don’t live with day to day and sometimes other family members, in a comfortable and safe environment. For more information, see National Association of Child Contact Centres: National Association of Child Contact Centres

Domestic violence and abuse

Acknowledgement form (Form C7) – the form a respondent uses to tell the court that they have received the application and whether or not they object to it.

Allegation - a claim that someone has done something wrong.

Alternative dispute resolution – this refers to ways of sorting out disagreements without going to court. It includes methods such as mediation and arbitration.

Applicant – the name given to someone who applies to a court for a court order.

Application – how you ask a court to do something.

C1 - the application form that starts the process of asking for a parental responsibility order.

Cafcass – the Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service. Cafcass operates in England.

CAFCASS Cymru – the Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service Cyrmru. CAFCASS Cymru operates in Wales.

Cafcass officers (sometimes also called family court advisors) – are specialist social workers whose job is to help parents reach an agreement (where possible) and write reports for the court about the needs of children.

Civil partners – same or opposite sex couples who have entered into a civil partnership.

Cohabitees – opposite and same sex couples who live together and are neither married, nor civil partners.

Confidential contact details Form C8 - The form you fill in if you don’t want to reveal your contact details (your address, telephone number, email address) or the contact details of your child or children. Form C8 is just for the court – so they know where you are and how to get hold of you. The information you give on it will be kept secret unless the court orders differently.

Court order - an official decision by a court. In certain circumstances, courts can impose penalties if court orders are disobeyed.

Directions - instructions about how a case will be dealt with.

Dispute Resolution Appointment (DRA) – this is a court hearing which takes place towards the end of the court’s involvement in your case. It gives you another opportunity to see if you can sort out your disagreement with the help of the court.

EX160 - the form you use to apply for help paying a court fee.

File – take or send legal forms or documents to a court.

First Hearing Dispute Resolution Appointment (FHDRA) – the court hearing which takes place at the beginning of the court’s involvement in your case.

FM1 - the form that confirms you have attended a Mediation and Information Assessment Meeting or that you don't have to do this.

Hearing – the name given to a meeting with a judge or magistrates.

Issue – officially start court proceedings.

Litigant in person – this is what the law calls you if you represent yourself in court proceedings without the help of a solicitor or barrister.

Notice – a notice is a bit like a letter. They are the way courts tell you what is going on and what you need to do next.

Notice of proceedings - this tells you that a court case has started and when and where your first court hearing will take place.

Order for directions - this is a list of instructions telling you what to do and when.

Parental responsibility - all the rights and duties that go with being a parent.

Parental responsibility order – a court order that gives someone the legal rights and responsibilities of a parent.

Party – a person or group of people on one side in a dispute.

Proceedings – court action taken to settle a dispute.

Respondent – this is the name given to the person or people you have to give a copy of your application for a court order. A respondent can then reply or 'respond' to your application.

Serve – delivery of court documents, usually by post. In some circumstances, the courts also allow delivery by email.

Statement - a written summary of the background to the disagreement, any recent events that have caused the court application and your view about what should happen in the future.

Statement of Service form (C9) - the form you use to tell the court when you sent your application to the respondent(s).

Welsh Family Proceedings Officers - are specialist social workers, working for Cafcass Cymru. Their job is to help parents reach an agreement (where possible) and write reports for the court about the needs of children.

Disclaimer

The information in this guide applies to England and Wales only. The law may be different if you live in Scotland or Northern Ireland. The law is complicated. We have simplified things in this guide. Please don’t rely on this guide as a complete statement of the law. We recommend you try and get advice from the sources we have suggested.

The cases we refer to are not always real but show a typical situation. We have included them to help you think about how to deal with your own situation.